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It’s Not the Size of the Boat, Part 2

By: The 4-Way Panel

Dear 4-Way,

My boyfriend has a tiny penis. I’m talking like maybe three inches tiny—and that’s when it’s hard. The sex isn’t bad, but it’s not great either. I know that this shouldn’t bother me, but for some reason it does. We have oral sex pretty much every day—sometimes twice—which makes me think he’s aware of this problem and wants to try to please me in different ways. The problem is that I’m so hung up on his smallness that I can’t concentrate anymore, and I rarely come from anything. Do other people have dicks this small? We haven’t been dating that long, and I’m not sure he’s Mr. Right, so I’m considering breaking up with him since the sex is so average. That makes me feel a little shallow, though. What do you guys think about all this?—VW

Chris    The straight man’s perspective: Chris Kennedy

Yes. That’s my answer. Yes.

Yes, he’s small. Yes, you’re a bit shallow. Yes, you should break up with him.

Yes, if you break up with him, he will have a chance with someone who is comfortable with his size.

Yes, you will have a chance to find your Mr. (bigger than three inches) Right.

He should be applauded for trying all that he can to please you using what God gave him. Unfortunately, that’s not working for you. And maybe not for him either … maybe he thinks your vagina is too big. Doesn’t matter, you two don’t seem to be a good fit.

I feel bad for him, but I believe his desire to please will compensate for anything he’s lacking elsewhere, and there will be a woman out there for him.

I do caution you that you not being open to a guy who is trying to please you as best he can could be a bit of an issue. You can’t just lay back and enjoy it?

Keep in mind, a guy with a bigger penis may not give you the pleasure you hope for either. He may not even care as much as this guy does to make sure you’re stimulated in other ways. Maybe you should wish for good things in small packages.

Consider this as you move on to bigger, but not necessarily better, things and thingies.

Check in tomorrow to read the straight woman's perspective by Rebecca Brown.

The 4-Way is published monthly. If you have a question for our 4-Way panel, please send it to them in care of the editor at To read more of The 4-Way columns or to listen to our podcasts, visit The 4-Way now.