With San Francisco's iconic annual foot race just 10 days away (May 16), I thought I'd deliver this gentle reminder for as-yet unregistered runners, walkers and float maneuverers—costume-clad or not—to sign up. And, not just because I'm a total teetotaler or a stick-in-the-mud (both of which I can be, often), I'd like to bring to light the Bay to Breakers' official stance on booze without incurring a barrage of boos, hisses and lobbed rotten eggs or tomatoes. Don't shoot the messenger, people.

From the website:

"Kegs and glass bottles will be removed from the racecourse. Anyone publicly drinking or displaying public drunkenness on or along the racecourse will be subject to fines and prosecution."

I realize this stern warning won't deter much, but I just thought I'd do my part to prevent a) unnecessary arrests b) unintentioned drunk dials c) embarrassing moments caught on film and broadcast on the evening news. So, you're welcome. If the race's famously jovial atmosphere isn't intoxicating enough, then maybe you should just stay home.

OK, killjoy moment over.