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open relationships

Two Sense: Should I Give My BF a Hall Pass for Burning Man?

My boyfriend is headed to Burning Man for a week and wants a BM hall pass. I’m not a Burner and have no problem with him going alone, but I’m not sure about this. He says everyone does it. But we’ve been monogamous for over a year and I feel it could greatly upset our connection.

He Said: It was Burning Man; it was a Las Vegas weekend; it was Mardi Gras; it was a high school reunion; she was crying and I felt for her; they wanted to see what the Power Exchange was like; I was really drunk; I did it to get even with you; I was tripping; it was Thailand; it was months ago now; it was a work Christmas party; it was a mistake that made me appreciate you more; you know how Italy is; she was gay but curious; I didn't know the massage came with a happy ending; he reminded me of you; BART wasn't running and she had a hotel room; we just finished that big work project; I think he spiked my drink with something; I was sound asleep and she crawled into bed with me; you would have done the same thing; it was a bachelor party; it was therapy; she wanted to make her ex jealous; OK, I needed the money.

The Monogamy Dilemma

My boyfriend and I are very committed but he recently told me he wants to try an open sexual relationship. We know a couple who have been doing this for several years and although they have some issues, they seem happy enough. I’m much more concerned that this could break us up than I am excited about having sex with someone else. Any suggestions?

He Said: Yes I do have a suggestion: Ask yourself what it is that you are committed to. If the answer is committed to being a couple, which it sounds like, then do not have an open relationship. Outside action is usually a symptom that something central is missing and if you want to stay with your boyfriend, find out what the real need is and fill it.

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