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Bay Area Power Couples: La Ciccia's Massimiliano Conti & Lorella Degan

It's hard to start a business in the Bay Area. And even harder to make it successful. We're inspired by the couples who have done it together and have decided to highlight them every week in our new "Bay Area Power Couples" blog series. Check back on Fridays for Q&A's with the couples who run some of our favorite local businesses.

The STD Discussion

At what point do you disclose an STD and how? I have genital herpes and seldom have outbreaks, but I haven't told my boyfriend of three months. We've been through HIV testing, we're monogamous, and I'm on the pill, so we don't use condoms anymore. With the treatments available, I won't likely give it to him, but not telling him seems dishonest.
 

Why Is My Girlfriend So Jealous? (DUH!)

My girlfriend and I have been dating on and off for over two years. In the beginning, one thing keeping our relationship stagnant was the fact that I thought I had romantic feelings toward one of my closest female friends of five years, and had admitted this to my girlfriend. When I realized I did not have these feelings for the friend, I was ecstatic and fully committed to my girlfriend. The last eight months have been some of the greatest of my life—that is, except when this friend and I try to make plans to see one another. My girlfriend becomes abrasive and questions everything about the interaction, claiming it's a "date." She calls and texts constantly, and I have even caught her reading texts to my friend behind my back.

Trying to Date an SF Lameboy

I hear a lot about SF guys being unable to commit to a longterm relationship, but I’m having trouble finding one who can simply commit to a date! Whether I meet the guy through friends, while out on the town or online, what I’ve been finding are a lot of men who are GOP (great on paper)—educated, career-minded—but who flake like dandruff. Last Sunday a guy showed up for brunch an hour late, in his workout clothes and covered in sweat (all to "train for a 5k"). Other guys have FOMO (fear of missing out) and never commit to a time or place, just in case something else comes up.  My girlfriends and I sometimes swap and forward these guys’ hilarious messages. Here’s one thread:

Lame-o: "When do I get to see you next?"

Me: "Whenever."

Lame-o: "Well, I can't this weekend. Maybe some other time?"

Me: "Oh, ok."

Lame-o: "Ok, bye."

Any advice on how to find an SF guy who can show up to a real date?

Bay Area 'Power Couples': The Compound Gallery's Matt & Lena Reynoso

It's hard to start a business in the Bay Area. And even harder to make it successful. We're inspired by the couples who have done it together and have decided to highlight them every week in our new "Bay Area Power Couples" blog series. Check back on Fridays for Q&A's with the couples who run some of our favorite local businesses. 

We're kicking off our first edition with Matt & Lena Reynoso of the Compound Gallery and Art in a Box, which we highlighted in this year's Best of the City: Design.

Is it Inappropriate to Throw a Bachelor Party for Your Second Marriage?

My girlfriend and I recently got engaged, and all my guy friends—especially the married ones with kids—are talking about throwing me a bachelor party in Vegas. This is my second marriage, and I feel like it’s inappropriate to throw a (second) big bachelor party. What do you think?

To Threesome or Not to Threesome?

My wife recently asked me if I wanted to have a ménage à trois with her and a girlfriend of hers.  The girlfriend is smoking hot which makes it tempting but the flip side is that this women’s boyfriend wants the same situation with his girlfriend and my wife. My wife and I have been monogamous up till now and she says she’s willing to try this arrangement if I am.

He Said: Everyman's Dream, may I introduce you to Everyman's Nightmare. Wow and ouch. You haven't said how you feel about another man having sex with your wife, so maybe you are still trying the idea on for size to see how it fits. Here are some ideas to mull over while you measure yourself for a suit of amour.

Is Kissing "Cheating"?

When I’m out at night with my girlfriends we occasionally meet guys and, though I’m in a committed relationship, I still find myself kissing one now and then. The strangest part is that because my relationship with my boyfriend is so solid, I feel like kissing these guys is OK and I'm not really cheating. Am I kidding myself?

Saying No to an Arranged Marriage

I’m a 27-year-old Indian woman and have been madly in love with a wonderful man who isn’t Indian for three years. My parents are very traditional, don’t like this guy, and want me to marry another Indian. My boyfriend and I are thinking of eloping, but not only would our marriage bring some shame to my family, I have an older sister who is also somewhat traditional and it would make it harder for her to marry into a good family if I got married first. Any suggestions?

When Do You Apologize?

My husband is generally a caring and compassionate man, but when we get in an argument he never admits fault or apologizes. It’s like it’s not in him. I know this is the pattern in his family too. When the argument is over, he goes about his day, no grudges held, but no sorry either. I might err on the side of apologizing too much, but part of the reason for that is that I hate conflict and want it to be resolved as soon as possible. Otherwise, I internalize it and fume. So, no apology from him equals me fuming for days, while he’s moved on.

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