Want to kick your usual Christmas traditions to the curb? Use our ideas to get it done.

Shows
"The Nightmare We Call Christmas" + A Screening of Edward Scissorhands
Peaches Christ Productions presents a holiday celebration fit for misfits and everyone on Santa's naughty list. Come join in on a night of "goth holiday glory" at the Castro Theater with a screening of Edward Scissorhands and a pre-show, anti-Christmas pageant appropriately titled "The Nightmare We Call Christmas." The show pays tribute to all the eclectic characters Tim Burton has given us over the years. Expect to see the likes of Beetlejuice, Pee-Wee Herman, and the Queen of Hearts gallivanting across the stage—and let's not forget about Winona Ryder. Remember to grab a cocktail in the North Pole-Dancer Lounge (aka Castro Mezzanine) on your way in.
When: 8 pm, Sat. 12/15
Where: Castro Theatre, 429 Castro St.

Golden Girls SF: The Christmas Episodes
SF's favorite drag queens are back starring in their seventh annual Christmas "exdrag-a-ganza." Heklina, Cookie Dough, Matthew Martin, and Pollo Del Mar take you on a hilarious journey through spinsterhood and polyester leisure suits. Costars Manuel Caneri and Laurie Bushman round out the cast. Perfect material for a night of anti-holiday merriness.
When: 8 pm, Fri. 12/14–Sun. 12/16, Thurs. 12/20–Sun.12/23, Thurs. 12/27–Sun. 12/30
Where: Victoria Theater, 2961 16th St.

Kung Pao Kosher Comedy
This Christmas brings the 20th anniversary of this uniquely Bay Area alternative holiday event. The idea behind the Kung Pao Kosher Comedy is simple: Take a Jewish Comedy show, Chinese Restaurant venue, and host it over the biggest Christian holiday of the year. Throw headliner Judy Gold (Emmy Award winning actress & writer) into the mix, and you may end up with Sriracha sauce coming out of your nose. With a total of eight shows over four days, catch either the early dinner show or the later cocktail viewing—Yiddish fortune cookies are an added bonus.
When: 6 pm and 9:30 pm, Sat. 12/22 and Mon. 12/24, 5 pm & 8:30 pm, Sun. 12/23 and Tues. 12/25
Where: New Asia Restaurant, 772 Pacific Ave. 

Movies
Les Misérables
It's only the movie everyone's been talking about. See Anne Hathaway try to hit those high notes while you cry your way through Christmas Day.
When: Releases in theaters Tues. 12/25
Where: Check local theater listings next week

The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey IMAX 3D
What's a better way to avoid the sound of jingle bells than immerse yourself in an IMAX 3D experience? Thankfully, The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey has come out just in the nick of time. Santa better watch out: The adventures of Bilbo Baggins and his thirteen dwarves through Middle Earth sounds like it will be the talk of the season. Move over Rudolph, Thorin Oakenshield is the new hero of the holiday season.
When: Now through the new year
Where: AMC Theaters, 1000 Van Ness Ave. & 101 Fourth St.

Outdoors
Bike the Golden Gate Bridge
Chances are, even if you don't partake in any Christmas celebrations, you've probably done your fair share of "tis the season" indulging. From end-of-the-year soirees to holiday parties, all of the festivities can add some girth to your waistline. Get biking, and beat the bulge. Long bike rides can be intimidating for newbies, but with hundreds of miles of beautiful trails, Marin County is a great place to start. Consult our "Ultimate Sunday Bike Ride" column for more tips and advice.
When: Sunrise till sunset, Sun. 12/23
Where: The Marin Headlands

Holiday Eating
Dim Sum Brunch at Legendary Palace
Escape the Christmas cheer and less-than-chipper crowds and head to the East Bay for a traditional Chinese brunch. Our favorite spot is the Legendary Palace in Oakland's Chinatown. Nosh on over 200 selections of Dim Sum, including dumpling soup and steamed lotus buns. Make a day of your trip, and check off some other items from our "50 Things to Do in Oakland Before You Die."
When:  Mon. 12/24 and Tues. 12/25
Where: 708 Franklin St, Oakland