Seven topical tidbits to discuss over coffee and a morning bun. 

Joan Rivers Fantasized About Streep, Vinton at Funeral, NBC 

I want craft services, I want paparazzi and I want publicists making a scene! I want it to be Hollywood all the way. I don’t want some rabbi rambling on; I want Meryl Streep crying, in five different accents. I don’t want a eulogy; I want Bobby Vinton to pick up my head and sing “Mr. Lonely.” I want to look gorgeous, better dead than I do alive. I want to be buried in a Valentino gown and I want Harry Winston to make me a toe tag. And I want a wind machine so that even in the casket my hair is blowing just like Beyoncé’s. - Joan Rivers 

IKEA Channels Apple in a Hilarious Ad for Its New Catalog ‘Bookbook,’ TIME

To play on the fact that browsing an IKEA catalog is a sort of holistic sensory experience, the company has created this clever new ad, which skewers Apple’s notoriouslyover-the-top product commercials. The result is hilarious, and the jokes really just write themselves.

Five-alarm Mission Fire Leaves 3 With Smoke Injuries, 2 Buildings Damaged, SF Examiner 

Three people were hospitalized for smoke inhalation, including one firefighter, and both Big House Inc and New Mission City (2626 Mission Street) were damaged. The cause of the fire is unknown.

Neighborhood Mailbox Stickers Let Communities Display Items They Have to Share, Springwise.com

Pumpipumpe is a Switzerland-based project that is encouraging residents to place stickers on their mailbox to denote the goods they’re willing to lend to their neighbors.

Man Constructs 3D Printed Concrete Castle, IFLScience 

Minnesotan contractor Andrey Rudenko is now the king of his castle; his 3D-printed concrete castle, that is. After completing a journey that took more than two years, Rudenko developed a customized 3D printer to extrude concrete and build a castle that he had designed himself. The entire structure is approximately 3 meters by 5 meters, which really makes it an amazing backyard fort rather than an actual livable structure.

Practice Squad Spot Means Health Insurance for Bengals Lineman to Care for Daughter Battling Cancer, Washington Post 

Still’s four-year-old daughter is battling pediatric cancer and by being on the Bengals’ practice squad, Still still has health insurance.The other silver lining for Still is that he won’t have to travel on road trips, allowing him to spend more time with his daughter.

If You Buy An 'iPhone 6,' Expect Your Phone Bill To Go Up, Huff Post 

Apple hasn't revealed any details about the so-called iPhone 6 yet, but here's something that doesn't need confirmation from Cupertino: If you buy the next iPhone, you're going to gobble a whole lot more data. And in a world where unlimited data plans are increasingly scarce, that may mean bigger bills.