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The Anti-Valentine's Day Agenda

a broken heart

Broken-hearted? Photo courtesy of Thread Rock

Love it or hate it, Valentine’s Day is heading our way. If you’re not a fan of the sugary sweet holiday, may we make some suggestions on how to celebrate the Anti-Valentine’s Day? Love hurts, so whether you’re running with the guys, the gals, or solo this Thursday, do it in style:

Recently scorned by a lover? Print out a headshot and bring it down to the only archery range in San Francisco. Located at the western edge of Golden Gate Park (next to the golf course), the range offers nine target bales and lessons on Tuesdays 2 – 4 pm and on Thursdays 12 – 2 pm and 2 – 4 pm. You’ll need to bring your own equipment for your target practice, and if a bow and arrow is not in your Burning Man costume trunk, you can rent gear from the SF Archery Shop at 3795 Balboa St. 415-751-2776. 

Need a good cleansing of any and all reminders of your ex? A beach bonfire with pals is a therapeutic way to get rid of those old love letters, cute photos, and thoughtful cards (gag). Head to Ocean Beach on the early side to grab one of the first-come, first-serve artistic fire rings between stairwell 15 and 21 (across from the Beach Chalet). Bring your own firewood (also available at the Safeway across the street) and any and all paper mementos from your latest sweetheart. Burning trash is forbidden, so limit the relics to the tear-stained, penned sort. Most likely, you’ll also be rewarded with an incredible winter sunset. More details and regulations here

Look, we’re sick of you lamenting about being solo, so stop being an Eeyore and join one billion others in a flashmob to end violence against women (men and women in 182 countries will be participating). At 10 am, CodePink and whoever else joins will be dancing across International Orange, then congregate in the middle for song, dance, ribbon-waving, and noise making. Meet up at the southeast end of the Golden Gate. Flashmobbing will also occur later in the day at City Hall for the same cause, 4 pm. Learn the dance beforehand here

If you’re feeling aggressive (or sexually frustrated) channel that energy into a tough workout. Hwa Rang Kwan Martial Arts Center in SoMa offers a range of taekwondo and kickboxing classes that come highly recommended (and they're not for wimps). Polk Street Boxing Gym offers your first class free so you can get a feel for its boxing and circuit training programs. If you’ve never been, register first. Try out the open class at Capoeira Brasil. If you think capoeira is a nice little dance, be forewarned, the core workout is intense and demands discipline (and a willingness to be incredibly sore for days afterward).

And, there's always the option to drown your sorrows in a martini at your local watering hole. Love stinks, but Valentine's Day is worse, so good luck out there, Anti-V-Day'ers.