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Valentine's Day: Where To Get Romantic, Or Not

Love it or hate it, Valentine's Day is here. Plan accordingly.

California Academy of Sciences "Sex and Science" Wine & Dine Tour

The day before Valentine's Day, see how love and sex manifests itself in the animal kingdom, from penguins to lobsters to sea slugs (!) and more, then toast your date over wine and a four-course meal at the museum's decorated Moss Room restaurant. Make it a double whammy with a quick trip to the de Young beforehand. $159 per person. Starts at 6 pm. 415-379-8000. Tickets here.

Mortified's Doomed Valentine's Show

Let's face it: everyone can get pretty damn angsty on Valentine's Day, and that's why Mortified is the perfect chance to blow off some steam before the big date. Staging their biggest shows of the year on Feb. 11 and 12 at the Makeout Room, and on Feb. 13 at the Shattuck Down Low in Berkeley, these performances will be all about the ugly, awkward side of love, complete with tons of stories of teenage make outs and other odd sexual encounters. Get tickets now here.

graffEATS' Dinner & A Flick

Get some street cred with your date by taking them to a special Valentine's Day underground dining experience at a currently-undisclosed location in the Mission. For $65 per person, you'll get an intimate five-dinner paired with five short films, but the best part is having it all be a secret until the moment arrives. Proceeds from the dinner will go to the Slow Food in Schools Project. When you sign up they'll tell you the dinner's locale, so get that blind fold ready for your sweetheart when Monday rolls around. From 6:30-10 pm. Hurry and grab tickets here, because they go quickly!

Valen-tiny Idea Night @ YBCA

Wrap your head around love and sexuality in the 21st century at this FREE event on Feb. 12 for couples and singles alike. Queercore author and spoken-word titan Michelle Tea will make you laugh at the politics of love while you contemplate the human form during a performance by Jess Curtis/Gravity. The turntables will be manned by DJ Primo, and you can hear a psychedelic presentation on the pharmacology and chemistry of love by Hamilton Morris, eat aphrodesiac foods, and play Infatuated, an interactive cell phone game all about breaking up and making up. All you have to do is show up. From 8 pm-midnight.

Snuggie Love

Snuggies are silly, but they can also be romantic. Have you ever tried to fit two people in one? Just joking....sort of. The Personality Hotels group, which includes Hotel Diva, Hotel Union Square and Kensington Park, offers a "Snuggie Love" package for couples this Valentine's Day. Starting at $159, you'll get an overnight stay at one of the three aforementioned hotels, a Monkey Snuggie, the Snuggie Sutra book, SKYY vodka, and late check out, just in case you have trouble getting out of bed the next morning. Click here to find out more, or call1-800-553-1900.

Avedano's Lonely Hearts Valentines Feast

Feast on hearts, literally, this year at Avedano's Lonely Hearts Valentines Dinner in Bernal Heights. Good for couples and groups of embittered Valentine's Day haters alike, come together and make new friends at this five-course meal that includes dishes like deviled eggs with duck heart paté, grilled heart of pork over frisee with lime-chili vinaigrette, Fernet ice cream and much more. It takes place on Feb. 13 and 14 in Avedano's Udder Room right next door to the butcher shop itself. Doors open at 7 pm for appetizers and champagne. You can bring your own alcohol too...there is no corkage fee! $85 per person.