by The 4-Way Panel

Dear 4-Way,

Do you think it’s a good idea to find out how many sexual partners the person you’re dating has had? If the answer is “yes,” when in the relationship is the best time to ask?—LL 

    The gay woman’s perspective: Jody Fischer

You only need to ask about how many sexual partners a person has had if you value your health, so of course, my answer is YES. Better questions to ask than simply a numerical value inquiry include: what kinds of risky sexual behavior have you engaged in? Do you practice safe sex? Can you attest to having good health currently? As to when to ask these questions, timing is indeed everything. I like to have this conversation before the clothes come off and preferably not on the way to the bedroom. It depends if this is going to be a “have some fun and run” encounter or a more long-term thing. Either way, ask, ask, ask. Sooner rather than later.

Check in next week for another Q&A series by The 4-Way.

The 4-Way is published monthly. If you have a question for our 4-Way panel, please send it to them in care of the editor at rbrown@realgirlsmedia.com. To read more of The 4-Way columns or to listen to our podcasts, visit The 4-Way now.