Unless you got in at Apple while they were still doling out the big stocks, you can probably forget about buying the home of your dreams (unless you're willing to move to Texas). But if you've got a million bucks, or something close to it, you might be able to make the most of it.
We could begin with some disclaimers: We know $1 million isn't cheap. And yes, there are homes out there for much less (sorry, we just don't want to live in them). And a $700,000 house in say, Austin, might have four bedrooms and pool. And just because a home in the Bay Area is listed for under a million, doesn't mean it won't sell for well over a million, cash. But we are making the most it, remember! The following "affordable" homes have plenty of potential—high ceilings, period details, sprawling backyards—so long as you're willing to overlook those rooms sized for hobbits, grandma's kitchen cabinets, and one bathroom per household.
Welcome home! (Just forget about moving to the South Bay).
San Francisco
Indulge in slow living in the Outer Sunset, where this airy abode has refinished hardwoods and a wood-burning fireplace perfect for chilly nights (that is, every night for the rest of your life). The master bedroom has private access to an expansive deck that looks out to a landscaped garden with an apple tree and dwarf lemon tree (not that any of this fruit will ever see sunshine). If the Flintstones isn't your vibe, you might consider smoothing over those faux textured walls. And if you can't get a loan to update that kitchen (hello, Formica!), you can always eat out!
Location: 1734 27th Ave. (Outer Sunset)
Size: 1,289 sq. ft.
Bedrooms: 2
Bathrooms: 1
Asking price: $995,000
// For more information and photos, visit 1734-27th.com.
▲East Bay
Just four blocks from Lake Merritt sits a rather charming bungalow listed at under $800,000. At first glance, square footage and a single bathroom are the bummers here, but the space absolutely feels like a larger home thanks to a gracious formal entry, high (sometimes vaulted) ceilings, and a surprising amount of natural light for a squat little Craftsman. Bonuses include turn of the century details, refinished wood floors, and a deck overlooking the wooded backyard and bamboo garden. Sure, the kitchen and island could use a designer's touch, but the vintage stove is cute AF. Best of all, it's just a few minutes from some of Oakland's best restaurants, not to mention BART. Just beware the "laundry room."
Location: 74 Hamilton Pl. (Oakland)
Size: 1,249 sq. ft.
Bedrooms: 2
Bathrooms: 1
Asking price: $769,000
// For more information and photos, visit 74hamiltonplace.com.
▲Wine Country
The folks back home may never believe you paid 800 grand for a 1,200-square-foot yellow house with purple exterior columns and window units, but they're just jealous that you can hop on your bike for a bit of world-class wine tasting in the neighborhood. This 1920 home in downtown Napa has all the vibes of country living, right down to the wraparound porch (BYO rocker!), quaint built-ins, and large backyard. TBH, we're kind of digging some of the vintage fixtures, and the remodeled master bath is as nice as any you'll find in the price point.
Location: 1941 Oak St. (Napa)
Size: 1,217 sq. ft.
Bedrooms: 2
Bathrooms: 2
Asking price: $798,000
// For more information and photos, visit compass.com.
▲Marin
When you live in a shoebox, you'll need all the natural light you can get. Luckily, this tiny cabin benefits from sunny weather in Fairfax thanks to ample windows and a huge deck, which makes for the ultimate sunbathing station. If you're here, then chances are you're single outdoorsy. And that's just perfect: The large wooded backyard, perfect for barbecues, and easy to access to Marin's many hiking and cycling trails, may be more than enough to distract you from this home's total lack of space and decorative details. Slap on a coat of paint then get outside!
Location: 308 Cascade Dr. (Fairfax)
Size: 960 sq. ft.
Bedrooms: 2
Bathrooms: 1
Asking price: $769,000
// For more information and photos, visit coldwellbankerhomes.com.
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